life
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Happy Birthday, Kiddo! We Made It!
2024, 57-years-old, adult-children-of-alcoholics, bipolar disorder, birthday, buddy-christ, Catholic, childhood, december, family, gift-to-myself, happy-birthday, i-love-you, indoctrination, its-my-birthday-month, jesus, kiddo, life, love, mental health, self-love, success, this-year, trauma, unquiet-mind, Winter SolsticeHappy birthday to the past and painfully young me. If eyes are the window to the soul, those eyes would reveal the storm raging in our most unquiet mind. Feeling unseen, irrelevant and invisible while at the same time trapped and claustrophobic. No power, no rage, no fists striking out blindly in anger; only the…
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Rest in peace, bestie who I believed you to be. Rest in peace, the oldest, dearest part of me. Rest in peace, that child who felt she was never enough; Rest in peace, little one, I know it’s been rough. Rest in peace to the girl who always felt judged, who didn’t really lie about…
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Into the Looking Glass I Go
carnival, death, deity, distortion, evil-queen, funhouse, funhouse-mirror, irish-catholic, lies, life, looking-glass, love, mask, mirror, prayer, self-love, skunk, snow-white, souls, stank, stanky-stank, truth, unloved, windowI can’t see a mirror without thinking of magic portals and hidden worlds of incredible beauty where fantastical creatures roam. Centaurs and fairies, nymphs and unicorns alike, residing together in this mystical place. Mirrors are magical to me; from the first time I looked into a mirror and saw a wild child with curly hair,…
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Return To My Childhood Castle
7 year old, bluejays, bringer of life, calm, caring, castle, castle walls, child, child of the Universe, compassionate, crested tit, EMDR therapy, eyes, feelings and fears, foreboding, fresh from the dryer, gray, grown woman, healer, Higher Power, inescapable, information, life, light, love, loving parent, magpies, mission, pigeons, puffins, purpose, relevant, sadness, safe, sage, Sherlock Holmes, soul, sparrow, starlings, strength, summon, therapy, thick, thought palace, travel, unconditional love, wet blanket, whole, wise, wise womanWhere does a 7-year-old go to when the world gets to be too much? Well, if you’re me, you go to your castle. Rather like the mind palace of Sherlock Holmes but instead of holding information, this castle houses a little girl and all the feelings and fears she brings with her. It provides a…
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The Only Thing That Really Matters Is Love
2018, apartment, bad idea, baggage, beloved, California, childhood, Christmas, common sense, compassion, concern, dead of winter, dopamine hit, event planner for end of days, family, gift, good idea, grace, healing, ice, Jefferson Airplane, Kindness keeps you young, letting go, life, Logic, Long Term Friends, love, Magnificent Disaster, mania, material goods, Meanness makes you old, mental health, Mid-West, Minnesota, Out of the Cage, Practical Magic, rent, retirement, Retirement She’s Come Undone 2018 Tour, Scion xB, Scotland, Scrabble, snow, The Committee, travel, trippy, vacations, White Rabbit, worn-out teddy bear, Worst Case Scenario, Wright BrothersWhen I retired and thought my destiny would be found in a tiny little town in Minnesota in the dead of winter, I reveled in the freedom of being able to tie a pretty little bow in what had become my past and move forward with all the energy and gusto of a professional deal…
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After a lifetime of struggling with bipolar disorder, trauma, shame and secrecy, I have found the light. THERAPY!
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Whether you hate her, love her, don’t know who she is and/or don’t care, most people are aware of the force of nature that is Miley Cyrus. I never watched Hannah Montana, never really felt any sort of kinship with her (she’s quite a bit younger than me being the most obvious) but I can…
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When you can’t leave the past in the past, but you want to heal.
Mostly Michelle Marie 